I've been thinking somewhat about femininity. Specifically the move away from female acceptance of it. We shame girls who act like girls - girls who wear dresses, heels, make-up, do their hair, we call them attention whores. We say things like "who do they think they are?". We belittle women who call men, "their man" and who gush over them and are happy to have them. We feel better when we can bitch and moan about what a jerk he is, or how lazy or how stupid. Why is that? Why do most TV sitcoms have domineering women who wear the pants in the family, think Everyone Loves Raymond. Why would I Love Lucy not fly in our times? Or Archie Bunker's wife Edith? Feminine mystique has really become a mystery in its absence. It's become contrived, think Real Housewives of any damn city. I think women are losing the art of being a real girl. We dress girls up like ho's when they're 10, we give them thong underwear at 12 so they don't have panty lines (ya right moms), we don't teach them the art of skillfully applied lip gloss we teach them how to apply false lashes. A girls education on how to behave is MTV and YouTube, if not Redtube.
To be feminine is to be different than masculine but in our ever increasing desire for equality (wtf) we decide to become manlike in order to compete? Real women don't think like men, look like men or want to be men. Do I feel that women have unfair disadvantages? Sure. Do I think rights for women should be sought? Yes. I also feel men have disadvantages and need rights they don't have (aka marriage dissolution and child rearing). It's not about a power struggle it's about doing the 'right' thing.
A saying I grew up with and I repeat fairly regularly, "life isn't fair". When someone tries to tell you it should be, fine, but fact is it isn't. Besides which what is fair to you isn't necessarily fair to someone else. Some would think it's unfair they can't have 'consensual' sex with underage people. I would argue that underage people can't necessarily make good long term decisions. etc etc
I digress which perhaps is a girlie trait. I have been known to rabbit trail and most times can track back to what got me started, I imagine this is annoying to men who have more linear thought patterns. Should I try to become more linear in my thinking? Men on many PUA sites would like women to be more feminine but then are irritated by the very things that makes us feminine. You can't have it both ways guys. If feminine simply means submissive behaviour and girly appearance you're missing other feminine traits - sensitive, emotional, nurturing, flighty, giggly, sensual, yes even hypergamous. I'm not saying all girls are all those things in large doses, but if we could let ourselves be real we'd experience all of it and embrace it.
The pendulum always swings back and I predict a return to the lost art of being a girl. Just not in my lifetime. If I can influence even one person to think about what I've written and be accepting of her femininity and influence one man to accept women for what we really are I'll be one very happy girl.
(sorry I wrote this really quickly, thoughts just pouring out, and I have to run before a good edit - but hope you get the point)
